Teach Your Daughters to Model Kindness in Five Easy Steps + Giveaway!

Written by: Alecia Spendlove

My daughter Alex is only 6, and I’m already hearing about “girl drama” at school. Negative comments like “I don’t want to play with you” or “I don’t like what you are wearing today” are hurtful interactions that can make girls feel isolated and alone.

Girls as young as preschool are dealing with friendship struggles and various degrees of social cruelty. It seems hard to imagine your baby involved in such situations, but social conflict takes various forms and is more common than we think.

Peer pressure and the desire to fit in can lead girls tosay things that are unkind and at odds with their true personality. It causes fights and divisions rather than a unity of kindness.

How can we give our daughters the proper support and tools to handle a tough social situation? How do we guide them on the journey they are about to embark upon in daycare, on the playground, in school?

1. Have a Mommy-And-Me Tea Party
Do an activity your daughter enjoys and let the conversation flow freely. Hear her out and help her come up with strategies to resist bullying and assist those who suffer under the influence of a bully. It’s important for her to understand that she has a choice to be mean or nice.

2. Celebrate Your Daughter’s Inner Moral Compass
Help your daughter listen to her inner voice and be a leader. In her heart, she remembers the lessons you’ve taught her, so be there to guide and support her.If she makes a poor choice, don’t be too quick to lecture. Ask her to tell you how she could have made a better decision. This will empower her to trust her instincts and follow her voice.

3. Teach the Power of Forgiveness
Encourage your daughter to forgive others and herself for unkind actions. Letting go of regret and grudges will bring her peace and open the possibility for better choices in the future. Emphasize that life is about learning from our mistakes and doing better next time.

4. Embrace Diversity
Teach your daughter to support and appreciate others for their different personalities and styles. We have a lot to learn by accepting other people for who they are.

5. Teach Conflict-Resolution Strategies
Collaborate to develop steps she can follow if a peer situation gets out of hand. My daughter has learned to start by using her words first. If words are ineffective, she looks for a grown-up to help resolve the problem or goes to play with a different group. In reality, not all conflicts can be resolved using my daughter's rubric, but it’s helpful to develop one that works for your family.

WIN IT!! First 50 NPN Members to commment below will recieve the Alexandra Rain app to download for FREE! You must be a NPN member. A code will be emailed to you after contest closes. Not a NPN Member? Join or renew today!

Alecia Spendlove is a mother, a wife and the creator of Alexandra Rain, Super Model Extraordinaire. An interactive children's book series and music focused on modeling kind, positive behavior. Alexandra Rain is a fashionista and likes to model clothes and jewelry, but her primary focus is modeling the kindness in her heart! Compassion and love are her most beautiful accessories! Alexandra Rain SME: Friend's to the Rescue is currently available at the App/Itunes store and is about teaching girls to "stand up" and model COURAGE! For more information please visit www.alexandrarain.com!

Posted on November 29, 2012 at 7:02 AM